“Are You A ‘Groan Up’ Part (2) Two” or “A Confession That Threatens My Ministry” or “I am Judged Of No Man”

“Ye that are spiritual judge all things, yet ye are judged of no man”
(1 Corinthians 2:13-15)

I am going to make a confession (DV).  I am fully aware that this confession could cost me my ministries and the respect of my Christ-ian piers.  I have thought long and hard on this confession but I must be open and transparent…even if it is to mine own hurt (the Psalmist).  Prior to making this confession, however, I ponder what my readers are expecting?  Do they expect a confession about opiode abuse? Alcohol abuse? An addiction to online pornography? What do you expect from me?

I confess….that….I …own over (60) sixty Batman action figures….(60) sixty and counting. I further confess to enjoying super hero comics and DVDs. I confess to enjoying Myomoto Usagi Yojimbo (A Samurai Rabbit) comic.  I enjoy “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” stuff.  My readers, you will not find me in the porn section of a video store (where I have found a believer entering once) or at a liquor store buying alcohol but you may encounter me at a comic book store or in a toy section of a store. You might even find me at a Toys R Us because I am a toys r us kid.

This writer still plans on being a wrestling or MMA champion or a Super Hero.  If you find all of this offensive you are a bore even C.S. Lewis says so. Worse than a bore, you are a “groan up.”  We will now continue our argument for remaining a child-like adult (DV).

God is a collector of action figures.  Does God not order the steps of a good man? Did Paul not warn Timothy against “grown ups” looking down upon his youth? Paul told Timothy not to allow this. He did not tell Timothy to act older than he was. Did God not choose you as a person might choose an action figure? Are not your actions God ordained? Does He not provide you with clothing as a little girl might dress a Barbie doll? Does He not feed you as a little toddler might pretend to feed a baby doll?

Let me use two (2) disciples for an example of “childlike” groan up and a “groan up” adult. Peter believed he could walk on water…how child-ish is that?  Thomas, on the other hand, refused to believe in the risen Christ except he saw Him with his own eyes. What a “Manure” way of seeing things. Christ told Thomas that he believed after seeing but the one who believes without seeing is blessed more. Yes, the childlike believer is blessed greater than the “groan up” believer.

After-all, let us look at what we, as Christ-ians, believe:

  1. We believe that A Jewish Man called Jesus Christ lived a life without doing a single thing wrong. We believe His actions were pure as were His thoughts!!!  To the “grown up” human this is impossible to conceive of much less believe.
  2. We believe this Jew died over (2000) two thousand years ago as He was crucified on a cross in Jerusalem and that (3) three day later He rose from the dead.  For the “Grown up” this is impossible.
  3. We believe that this Jew ascended up into Heaven, IE. Floated up into the clouds.
  4. We believe this Man has been sitting on a literal throne in a literal place called Heaven.
  5. We believe that this God-Man hears our prayers and answers them.
  6. We believe that soon this Man Who died and rose again over (2000) two thousand years ago will arise and return to this earth and set up His kingdom where we will reign with Him.
  7. We also believe This Jesus Christ is part of a Godhead and shares sovereign power and control with His Father Who is God and with the Holy Spirit Who is also God. Yet we claim to believe in only One God.
  8. We believe that the Holy Spirit dwells within everyone who repents of their sins and believes in this (3) three Person God that is only One God.
  9. We believe this God to be Everywhere at once, knowing all things, and being all powerful with zero exceptions.
  10. And we believe that this great Godhead dwells fully in the God-Man Named Jesus Christ, that lived and died and lived again over (2000) two thousand years ago.

    No “grown up” with all his or her mental faculties in tact could honestly believe these things.  Even Jesus Christ taught this!!!  “Except a man be born again he can not see the kingdom of God.”  (John 3).  In other words, unless you become a little baby again you cannot believe in Me. This Word stunned the “groan up” Nicodemus.  Paul said the same, “The natural man (The “groan up”) receiveth not the things of the Spirit…. for they are spiritually discerned” or received as a little child.

Often times when wishing someone a happy birthday, I encourage them to escape adulthood whenever possible. I certainly do. One of the reasons my kids and I get along so well is I can still be one myself. However, one must know when to be “a kid” and when to be a “grown up” or when to be serious.

When I sit down to the Scriptures I am gravely serious, yet still owning a childlike faith. I do not play around with the Word of God.  When I take my place in the pulpit to where God hath called me, all childish things are put away. I become a man much like, “the Man Christ Jesus.”  There are no jokes and we do not play around. For though our faith is childlike our calling to ministry is a call to soberness and gravity. When I am in the pulpit or acting out of the office of minister there is no thought of Batman, super heroes, the Samurai Rabbit, cartoons, comics, or MMA championships, etc. NO, I am a man of God, teaching the Word of God to the people of God and there be no place for childish things, except childlike faith.

How about you?  Are you a boring “groan up” adult all the time?  or are you a “childlike” adult who is ever growing up but never becoming a “groan up” adult?

Let me correct one thing from above. I did enter an adult bookstore several years ago. I entered it’s doorway and asked rather LOUDLY if i might tell the persons present about the death, resurrection, and forgiveness of The Lord Jesus Christ. The store clerk, with respect, disallowed me from doing so, though I have already done so. I learned a valuable lesson the next day. I recounted my experience to Pastor Ruben of Lighthouse Baptist Church in Romeoville/Plainfield. He asked me if I had ever done the same thing in a “Jewel” Grocery store.  His point being, a lost person at “Jewel” is just as lost and in need of Christ as a person in any adult bookstore. A very important lesson was learned that day from a good pastor, who hasn’t groan up yet either.

Before we conclude let’s take a quiz to see if you are all “groan up” yet or if you are still a kid at heart.

  1. Do you play video GAMES?
  2. Do you still get excited about Cars (Bob Price, Uncle Jerry), Trains (Chet Evans) or airplanes or boats (Bill Neehouse) Do you view them as more tham a mode of transportation?
  3. Are you a Trekkie or do you still avoid “the Darkside?”
  4. Do you enjoy the GAMES of football or baseball or soccer, etc?
  5. Batman or Superman, choose one. Did you choose one?
  6. Do you enjoy Super Hero movies, animated or live action?  Do you still enjoy action adventure movies?  Psychologists will tell you that most persons, especially men, live vicariously through these films and through watching sports.
  7. Do you have a toy somewhere in your office? on your desk? or a baseball bat or football on a shelf? Or Swords on your wall (Allen Muxlow)?
  8.  THe “Lone Ranger” or The “Shadow” Choose one, did you choose?
  9. Do you have in your closet a character t-shirt?
  10. Did you know that the action figure industry shows it’s demographics to be adult males?
  11. Why do you think Super hero films do so well?  Why are many of the action figures priced so high?  It is because adults are funding it all.
  12. Do you collect Sports cards or collectibles?  Some sports collectables can sell in the millions of dollars.


As I conclude, I must point out that my confessions above should not cause me to lose anything, I was using hyperbole. However, if my confessions cost me your respect that is fine because you would bore me anyway…..Groan ups, UGH!



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